99 problems and a ghost is one..

I'm being haunted. Yeah. 


It all started innocently enough. It was last Friday night in New Orleans.  Heebs and I are trying to find something to do beside getting Bourbon Street induced alcohol poisoning. We came to New Orleans a couple months back for his birthday and attempted Bourbon but our livers hearts weren't in it anymore. Perhaps it was the sidewalk strippers trying to lure us into their shame dungeons. Or maybe the overly aggressive shot girls that would literally pour grain alcohol down your throat when you weren't looking and then demand $28 dollars. Either way, we've outgrown it and decided to explore other options. 


Me: Omigod, let's go on this haunted tour of New Orleans! It has like 5 stars on tripadvisor.com! This one guy said it MADE his trip!
Heebs: Ughffffttt
Me: What?! You don't want to go?!?!!?!
Heebs: Hmm... I guess... 
Me: YAYAAYAYA! This is going to be fun! 

So, we meet up with our tour guide and about 20 others at the Blacksmith bar on Bourbon. (Cool bar, oldest in Nola, See above!) I immediately note three things:


1. Wow, my tour companions has to be the most random ass group of people ever. In the history of tours.
2. Why did I wear jeans? (Even though it was close to 9 pm, it was still 120 degrees from my calculations)
3. I'm not so sure that this trashy, drunk couple should go on a walking tour seeing how they can't even stand. 


But, I immediately dismiss my negative thoughts and start mentally coaching myself and my wary companion. "Let's keep an open mind!" "Maybe she makes stops at bars." 


So, we start off on the tour and she stops at some random pole, sits on the ground, and starts pouring cornstarch into some cross formation with random squiggilies. She said this will open up ourselves to the spirits. She also said at the end of the tour she would close out the pole squiggilies so we wouldn't get a hitchhiking ghost on our backs. Oh, okay?


To make a long story short, it was the hottest, most miserable night of my life. Ok, I'm being a little dramatic but it wasn't fun. And ever since that night, I have had been uncharacteristically scared of my own shadow. I'm convinced that I brought a hitchhiking ghost home. So far, the ghost doesn't really do anything but stand over me while I sleep. I know this because I keep abruptly waking up every couple hours with a general feeling of fright and agitation. Also, our lamp turned itself on and off throughout the night. Heebs said it's because we dropped it and the lightbulb is loose but I call bullshit. My soul is about to be devoured and it's all because that chain smoking, whack job of a tour guide.